This can't be happening.

I just found out that the ballet school i went to from the age of 5-18 is probably closing in a week. I don't go there anymore, but this is really making me fall apart. That school was everything to me. It was practically my second home for years. I have so many amazing memories from that school, i can't imagine it not being there anymore. I owe so much to that school and the director. She cared so much about all of her students and she was such an incredible teacher and mentor. She gave me and many other people some of the best experiences of our lives. It is incomprehensible to me that it could be closing its doors. I'm begging for a miracle to come and save this school. It can't close. It just can't.

Feeling Sorry - Paramore

You know you're making it harder and harder to give a shit. Believe me, I'm trying. But I'm really getting sick of it.

We still live in the same town, well don't we
But I don't see you around anymore
I go to all the same places
Not even a trace of you
Your days are numbered at 24

And I'm getting bored waiting round for you
We're not getting any younger
And I won't look back cause there's no use
It's time to move forward

I feel no sympathy
You live inside a cave
You barely get by
The rest of us are trying
There's no need to apologize
I've got no time for feeling sorry

Well I try not to think of what might happen
When your reality it finally cuts through
Well as for me I got out and I'm on the road
The worst part is that this, this could be you

And you know it too
You can't run from your shame
You're not getting any younger
And time keeps passing by
But you wave it away
It's time to roll over

I feel no sympathy
You live inside a cave
You barely get by
The rest of us are trying
There's no need to apologize
I've got no time for feeling sorry

And all the best lies
They are told with fingers tied
So cross them tight
Won't you promise me tonight
If it's the last thing you do
You'll get out

I feel no sympathy
You live inside a cave
You barely get by
The rest of us are trying
There's no need to apologize
I've got no time for feeling sorry

I miss you

Never thought that I'd be leaving you today
So alone and wondering why I feel this way
So wide the world
Can love remember how to get me home to you
Someday

We'll be together again
All just a dream in the end
We'll be together again

So many fears were swimming around and around in my mind
Who would have dreamed the secrets we would find

I've found a world where love and dreams and darkness all collide
Maybe this time we can leave our broken world behind

We'll be together again
All just a dream in the end

~Evanescence

---------------------

I miss you. I miss who you used to be. I miss having you in my life. I miss my family being happy. I miss not crying. I miss being able to sleep at night. I don't want to lose you. I keep hoping that I'm just going to wake up and it's all been a bad dream. Sometimes I almost think I will. I miss normalcy. I miss love. I miss laughing with you so easily. I miss not feeling like a traitor. I miss knowing what to do. I miss everything the way it used to be. I'm not going to give up. I just wish it didn't have to be so hard.

It's definitely time

For some more lyrics! Ha!

Surgery, by Jack Off Jill


I can change
I can cut it open
Look at me the way you did before
I can change
diagnose the symptom
buy the antidote but not the cure

Hold me under
cut away this empty
Hold me under
change the way I feel about you

I can change
I'll correct the defect
repair the injury called you and me
I can change
I'll surrender to it
I can suffer with the best of them

Hold me under
cut away this empty
Hold me under
change the way I feel about you

I can't change
I'll replace the decay
make you second guess your everyday
I can't change
I'll survey the damage
Kill the narcissist with his reflection
until tomorrow

Hold me under
cut away this empty
Hold me under
change the way I feel about you

Hold me under
cut away this empty
Hold me under
change the way I feel about you

until tomorrow

Number Dos

Dear Crush,

Even if most people hate you, I love you nearly as much as it is possible to love a fictional character. You feature heavily in my fantasies at the moment. Of course, my literary crushes are extremely fickle, so don't expect it to last long. Keep being awesomely evil, you Greasy Git, you :p